A weekend of jobs changing, laughs, drinks, good entertainment…oh yeah, and Grandma got tattooed

I don’t even know if I can come up with the words to describe this last weekend…but of course I will find a way!

So the latest news on the job (which by the time you read this may have already changed 25 times, so try and keep up)…the California company has submitted an amount to my travel company to buy out my contract. My boss in California says that she thinks they will go for this amount she has submitted but is just waiting to see. In the mean time I still have to go to Arizona to work at the place of my birth…I’m sure they will all remember me. My contract starts July 18th and ends October 28th….the only way I can get back to California ASAP is if my travel company finds a replacement to fill my position in AZ, which they are working at doing. So I end my California job on June 30th, will be flying to Maui for a vacation, fly back to California, and then drive to Arizona until either they find a replacement or until the end of October. If I have to work until the end of October the California job has said that they can’t guarantee me a job since it will be 4 months from now, but if it’s still available or if I come back to California sooner then I can have it for the mucho dinero I have asked for! So the next week and a half will be spent packing, saying goodbye to friends, and trying to see how many more times this scenario could possibly change.

So onto the weekend o’ fun! Mom, Grandma, and Mary came down to visit Erin and I. They flew in Friday night where we were supposed to meet them…however it was just me picking up the Elderhostel group since in typical Erin fashion that we all know and love…she was late. So I shoved the old ladies in the car and off we went back to my swanky apartment. Upon the arrival to the apartment it didn’t take but 2.3 seconds for mom and grandma to open the bottle of wine and start downing it like it was a secret elixir they had just discovered! Soon Mary and I were listening to grandma and mom “talking loudly” to each other, otherwise known as yelling, as they were sitting about 3 inches apart on the couch. Only in my family can you become hearing impaired not because you listen to your music too loudly but because everyone “talks loudly” when they are sitting directly next to you. However we were having fun and laughing so hard that we almost peed a little several times. About 2 hours later…the arrival of Erin! So of course we had to stay up and talk some more now that all of us where there. Around 3AM we finally went to bed upon waking up the next morning at 9:00 to go out to breakfast...and drinking tons of coffee.

After breakfast we headed up to Oakland and walked around Jack London Square…where we ran into my other mother! I wanted my moms to meet, however the weekend seemed too short so I didn’t think it was going to happen. As we were rounding a corner I heard my name and I turned to see my Filipino mom, dad, and brother. So the families finally got to meet and there is still debate on which mom I look the most like. After walking around in the heat we went back to Erin’s HOT apartment to get ready for dinner. We went to Teatro ZinZanni in San Francisco for dinner and had the best time ever! Four hours of dinner theatre that made us all laugh for hours plus a huge 5 course meal that was amazing! I recommend this to anyone…yes a little pricey… but so worth it! It was a night that we will remember…however Sunday I think we will remember a little more.

So Sunday rolls around and we all meet up in Oakland again and decide to go to the Haight. So we all cram in my car and head on up to Haight and Ashbury to walk around when mom blurts out one of her great ideas…”we should all get matching tattoos…kind of like a solidarity thing”. And of course because we are all related…we think this is a GREAT idea! So off we go to the local tattoo parlors to see if we can find a tattoo that we can all agree on…which at first doesn’t seem like it’s going to happen. People stare as we all walk in…various ages and all looking really out of place but of course in typical family fashion…we don’t care. Grandma continues to tell everyone that looks at us strangely that we are making her do this otherwise we will put her in the home. Of course we laugh hysterically but I’m just waiting for senior services to show up and haul grandma away because her family is abusing her. As we make our way down the street we walk into another tattoo shop and start rummaging through the many pictures when we finally find one…and we all agreed we liked it! We pounce on Marco, the tattoo guy, who looks at us like we’re all nuts…and we are. For $60.00 a piece he will deface our bodies with a butterfly. Excellent!

We all get our money out and grandma has her consent form in one hand and her cash in the other following the guy to the counter like a kid ready to pay for her candy bar. Mary is the only one who hasn’t filled out the form because she doesn’t want to do it for the fact that it will hurt. I tell her it hurts, but not that bad but she does not believe me…even though I try my hardest. So we don’t pressure her, but we do ridicule her because she won’t do it…this is how we work in this family. I know, we’re sick. So who’s first to go get inked….yup, my almost 76 year old grandma! As she walks up she asks Marco “Do you think we can bill Medicare for this?” Again we all laugh hysterically but Marco is still staring at us like we’re crazy…again, we are. So off we all go to the back where Marco gets set up and then it’s time. Grandma in a chair getting her first tat. All she needs now is a cigarette and a motorcycle. 15 minutes later she’s all done…we look at it and take pictures like we’re the paparazzi and she’s part of the Tom-Kat crowd. Her tattoo gets bandaged up and we move on to Erin. The girl who has the weakest stomach in the world and she looks like she’s going to puke as Marco takes the next 30 minutes getting everything cleaned and set up. She was a big girl and made it through the process and without puking…however the grimace on her face was priceless! Since grandma and Erin did it Mary felt like maybe she could…but still trying to really decide if she wants to go through all the pain and then Marco said the magic words…”I’ll do yours for $40.00”. Sold! So Mary is next in the chair where she gets marked and swears at us the whole time for not telling her how much it hurts…however the description of “razor blades cutting your skin over and over again” I don’t think would have gotten her to do it. Next up…mom. Even if she was in pain she wasn’t going to tell you…and she didn’t. She was bound to not give in…hmm I wonder where I get it. Everyone got their tattoos on their right arm but in classic Sierra fashion I dared to be different and get it on my foot. That son of a bitch hurts on the foot! Much more than the one on the hip! Damn! I sit in agony but stare at the spot on the wall and focus on breathing…a technique I teach patients, however they’re usually not getting tattoos when I teach them this. The pain is definitely there however when he gets near the toes the focus goes from the spot on the wall to the sharp piercing pain that is being drilled into my foot. Whose freaking idea was this?! Finally, it’s over and my foot gets bandaged up and we say our goodbyes to Marco…who I think is glad to be rid of us, and off we go.

We are all bandaged up with huge first aide pads on our arms and feet and walk out looking like we got in a street fight and drive our way down to the wharf where we get dinner. We are starving considering we have spent the whole day in the tattoo parlor…a great way to spend a whole Sunday afternoon. We all still can’t believe we did this…solidarity or stupidity…you can decide. Either way we all know we’re crazy and we have come to terms with this…however we’re family connected through blood and now tattoos.